The Start of Something
by spock-flavored
Summary: Five times Jim wanted to kiss Spock; and the one time he did.
1. Chapter 1

**The Start of Something: Chapter 1**

**Disclaimer:** Unfortunately, I can't be as lucky or as awesome to say that I own this. Boo :(

****A/N: ****I hope this is enjoyable and I'm not completely out of my league here, though I definitely feel it. Title shamelessly stolen from the title The Start of Something by Voxtrot. This song was on an amaing fanmix for a fic I read. Also, I know this has probably been done before, but this is my first time writing for this fandom and it seemed cute to think about. :)

XxX

Jim gazed up at Spock from his seat on the bio-bed. Bones stood in front of Jim, fiddling with a tricorder and muttering under his breath.

The half-Vulcan stood slightly behind Bones and to the left, with his hands loosely clasped at the small of his back. While he looked the perfect picture of someone paying attention, Jim could see the faraway look in his eyes.

Jim could also see the pain and sadness swirling in those brown depths. It made Jim ache. While Spock didn't let any his emotions rise to the surface, Jim knew they were there – if the incident on the bridge wasn't evidence of that enough.

Oh crap_._ Jim's ache intensified when he recalled the harsh words he had spoken. He would definitely have to apologize for that. While he knew it was necessary, he still felt like shit while doing it.

"…Jim?" Bones' voice cut through Jim's thoughts. At that moment, Spock came back to awareness and his eyes shot up to meet Jim's. The pure anguish Jim saw there made his breath hitch in his chest.

Oh god. Jim would do anything to get that look out of his eyes. Fucking Nero. Jim swore to god if the bastard wasn't already dead he beat him to a bloody pulp for doing this to his – to Spock.

Jim couldn't even imagine what it would be like to lose a mother and a home in less than a minute. The ache squeezed Jim's heart and he felt…felt…

He couldn't even think of any words to express the gnashing feelings of horror and pain that wrapped themselves around his being.

Spock was affected the most. How is he not utterly broken?

"_Jim_!" Bones shouted. Jim tore his gaze from Spock and focused his attention on his panic stricken best friend.

"_What_ Bones?" Jim asked, confused as to why Bones looked so panicked.

"Jeez kid, you scared the hell outta me!" Bones growled, "Answer me the next time I call you, you fucking imbecile." Jim smirked.

"Shut the hell up, Bones. I told you I'm fine." To illustrate his point, Jim tried to slide of the biobed, but his knees buckled as soon as his feet touched the floor.

"Of course you are. Now just lay back and let me do my goddamn job already." Bones grumbled and pushed Jim back onto the bed, keeping a hand pressed to his chest until he gave in and laid back against the crisp, white pillow. Jim crinkled his nose and the smell of antiseptic that seemed to cling to every surface in the room.

"Those Romulans beat you pretty bad, Jim," Bones was saying, "How the hell did you manage to run around? You've got at least three cracked ribs, deep bruising, and various other injuries." Jim rolled his eyes.

"I'm Batman." Jim declared, grinning at Bones. Spock looked as passive as ever over Bones' shoulder, though Jim thought he could detect some exasperation in his eyes.

"Yeah… you're Batman." Bones rolled his eyes and brandished a hypo. "See how invincible you are to these." The hypo stung like hell and Jim hissed along with it.

"You're going to hell, y'know that Bones?" Jim grumbled as he rubbed the spot on his neck.

"Like I care?" Bones grumbled, "You'll be fine, but you're sleeping here tonight. No way around it." Bones took of across the room and was in his office before Jim could even protest.

"Fucking madman." Jim mumbled. As his eyes started to droop, he realized that Bones must have given him a sedative. "Bastard…"

"Excuse me?" Spock's low tones cut through the fog clouding Jim's brain. Jim grinned lazily and directed his gaze at Spock.

"N't you Ssssspock." Jim slurred. What the hell was in this? "You're a cool du-dude." Jim grinned as his eyes tried to shut on him again. But wait! There was something important he had to tell Spock.

"Spock!" Jim shouted, trying to sit upright in his bed. His muscles didn't want to co-operate, however, so he just stayed sprawled across it.

"There is no need to shout, Captain," Spock stated, "I am right here." Jim smiled lazily, his eyes meeting Spock's once again.

"Yessssssss y'are." Jim giggled and then viciously bit his tongue to stop that undignified sound right away. Spock merely raised his eyebrow, which made Jim's attempts to stop _very_ difficult.

"_Spock_," Jim whispered intently, "There's son-som-something _impornmant_ I gotta tell ya."

"What is it, Captain?" Spock inquired politely, but with an undertone of irritation.

Jim frowned slightly, "I-I'm _sorry._" The corner of Spock's mouth dipped down briefly before his features set once again back to his mask.

"To what are you referring, Captain?" Spock asked.

"Y-your mom, and everything. So, _so_ sorry." Jim whispered softly.

Jim couldn't think very clearly anymore, and he had lost control of his limbs a long time ago. But he could definitely feel the ache wrench in his chest when Spock's eyes shone with sadness. All Jim wanted to do was kiss that perfect mouth and make it all go away, if only for a little while. But Nyota Uhura, the lucky gal, had that privelege….

Wait what? Jim squinted his eyes. He really fucking hated drugs. They messed with his mind and shit. Oh how he wanted to sleep.

"I- Thank you, Captain." Spock said quietly, before turning and striding out of Sickbay at a quick pace. Jim watched him go with a sad look on his face, before finally sighing and succumbing to sleep…

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

Six weeks into their five year mission, and James T. Kirk was bored. He's tired of the Admiralty going easy on the _Enterprise_ and her crew. For one, they're the flagship of the Federation. Not to mention, they stopped Nero from destroying Earth. Jim thinks they can handle more than this ridiculous amount of diplomatic missions they've been sent on.

Jim slouched down in the captains chair – _his_ chair – and sighed. He was counting the seconds until Alpha shift ended. After picking up a Deltan ambassador, they were on their way to the Gamma Quadrant to drop her off. It would take days to get there, and Jim was frustrated.

_5…4…3…2…_ "Captain." Spock's voice reaches Jim's ears from the vicinity of his right shoulder.

"Yes Mister Spock?" Jim asked, turning to give his First Officer his full attention. One second away from freedom. As tired and frustrated as he may be, Jim is always willing to make time to talk to Spock.

"As of now, you are off-duty. Correct?" Spock asked, standing calmly at parade rest with no signs of frustration or fatigue in the smooth line of his shoulders.

Jim raised an eyebrow. "Why yes, I am, Mr. Spock. Are you, by chance, stalking me?"

Spock stared blankly at Jim for a moment, and then raised his left eyebrow in exasperation. "Highly unlikely, Captain."

"I think I should be offended right now, but I'm going to let that slide. What do you need, Spock?" Jim asked with a lazy smile.

"I merely wished to inquire whether or not you would be amenable to partaking in a game of chess in my quarters at sixteen hundred hours." Spock stated, not responding to Jim's smile. But Jim thought he saw a slight warming of his eyes, and that caused a twist of warmth low in his gut.

"What an excellent idea." Jim grinned, eyes flashing. "See you then?" He heaved himself out of his seat and stretched, aching for his soft bed in his quarters.

"Indeed, Captain." Spock nodded, and turned to walk back to his station. Jim grinned and turned to the rest of the bridge crew.

"Sulu, you have the conn." Jim stated and Sulu nodded in acknowledgement. Jim nodded back. "Keep up the good work. I'll see you guys later." The rest of the bridge crew grinned and nodded.

Jim spun on his heel and made his way to the turbolift, not noticing the stare of one particular half-Vulcan crew member.

XxX

Jim snorted into awareness and kicked off the blanket that was tangled between his legs. What the hell had woken him up? Another chime at the door drew his attention to the fact that someone was awaiting entry.

"Lights seventy-five percent." Squinting at the sudden increase of light, he should have thought that one through, Jim made to move off of the bed. What he didn't account for was the fact that he still had a foot entangled in the sheets.

"Fuck! Shit! Goddamn _stupid_ fucking _sheets_, I swear to _God_ – " Jim sputtered into the cold metal floor of his quarters, not realizing the chiming had stopped. He did realize when two black, regulation boots appeared in his vision. Peering up at the intruder in his quarters, Jim smirked when he realized who it was.

"You wish you were that smooth, Spock." Jim muttered, delighting in the hint of exasperation he could see in Spock's eyes. While not the look of warmth and joy he was going for, better some reaction than none at all.

"Excuse me for overriding the entry codes, Captain. You did not answer in a timely fashion and when I heard the commotion, I decided the logical course of action was to enter your quarters to see that you were not gravely injured." Spock stated blandly. "As we can both see you are in optimum condition, I think it would be best if we proceeded with our chess game now."

"Oh whatever, Spock. You were just hoping to catch a glimpse of me naked." Jim's tongue darted out to lick at the split in his lip as he untangled his foot and pulled himself up off of the floor, settling back onto his bed. He scrubbed at his hair and grinned at Spock, who was successfully ignoring him as his eyes analyzed Jim's quarters.

"Hey, I thought we were playing chess in your quarters." Jim's brow furrowed in confusion. Spock simply raised an eyebrow at him and shifted his stance so that his shoulders were even straighter.

"That is correct. However, we also planned to meet at sixteen hundred hours, and it is now seventeen hundred hours. It seems to me that the plan must be altered because of unforeseen events." Spock stated evenly.

"Shit, Spock! Why didn't you wake me up earlier?" Jim exclaimed, running a hand over his face.

"How was I to know you were sleeping, Captain? I inferred that you must have forgotten, but I had my reasons for wanting to verify that fact." Spock looked away, and Jim could've sworn he saw a light dusting of green on Spock's cheeks.

"Oh yeah? What reasons?" Jim asked, now curious. Spock opened his mouth as if to reply, but then closed it and stared at Jim, no trace of emotion on his face. Jim raised an eyebrow at him and then rolled his eyes.

"Oh never mind. Would you like to play in here then?" Jim asked as he got up and stretched, closing his eyes in pleasure his muscles cramped from sleep finally got relief. Once again, he missed the stare his First Officer directed at him. Padding over to the replicator, Jim plugged in his order. He tugged on the old t-shirt he donned for his nap, untwisted it from his torso, and settled it over his sweatpants, still oblivious to the gaze on his back. How in the world did he manage to get tangled around _everything_ when he slept? As he retrieved his mug of coffee and inhaled the aroma, he turned questioningly to Spock.

"Spock?" He asked, tilting his head in confusion. Spock came back to awareness and blinked at his Captain.

"That would be acceptable." Spock agreed, making his way to the small table situated against the wall. Jim's brow furrowed as he set his coffee down on the table and took his chess set down from its shelf. Setting it on the table, he turned his questioning stare to Spock.

"Are you alright, Spock? Maybe I'm not the only one who needed some extra sleep." Jim said softly, not wanting to offend his First Officer with his assumptions. Spock stared at him for a moment.

"I assure you, I am quite well." Spock said, his eyes focused on the chess pieces he was setting up, placing the white pieces on Jim's side.

"If you say so." Jim muttered as he slumped into his chair across from Spock. He pulled his coffee toward him and took a long sip, simultaneously making his first move.

The game went on for a while, with neither Jim nor Spock that much more skilled than the other. They were evenly matched in skill and strategy, though Jim seemed to take a lot more risks. They ended up working in his favor though, something Spock was still trying to figure out.

"Check." Spock said, with a glimpse of triumph in his eyes. Jim narrowed his eyes at the board and moved his king to safety. As Spock made his next move, Jim pretended to be studying the board, but what he was really studying was Spock.

Jim could almost see the numerous scenarios and strategies being thought of and discarded just as rapidly in the Vulcan's eyes. What Jim wouldn't give to know what Spock was thinking? How fascinating would that be? Jim's gaze slipped from Spock's eyes to his lips, set in a firm line.

The sudden urge to lick and bite and _taste_ –

"Checkmate." The corner of Spock's mouth curled up slightly as he looked at his Captain.

"Captain?" Spock's voice, tinted with something - was that _emotion? -_ caught Jim's attention. Blushing fiercely, he halfheartedly looked over the board, his thoughts running wild.

"Seems you've gotten the best of me, Spock."

In more ways than one.

Fuck.


	3. Chapter 3

The next night, instead of the usual mass of paperwork he had to complete, Jim was content to sit in rec room 4 and watch Chekov be bombarded with presents and cake for his eighteenth birthday. Jim sipped his punch slowly, tasting the vodka that it had been spiked with. Jim shook his head and smiled slightly.

"Captain?" Jim swallowed heavily and his eyes darted up to meet Spock's, before quickly looking away. It was so damn awkward for him to look at Spock now. All shift he had managed to distract himself with the paperwork his yeoman brought him, but now Spock was standing right in front of him and he couldn't ignore him any longer.

"What's up Spock?" He asked in what he hoped was a cheerful tone, with no undertones of _I want you._

"May I sit with you?" Spock looked uncertain, and that confused Jim. Surely Spock didn't know that Jim was purposely avoiding him.

Not that Jim would do something that childish.

Of course not.

"Yeah! Yeah of course!" And if his voice sounded slightly hysterical and crazy, Jim ignored it and Spock had the decency to pretend it didn't happen.

Spock slid into the empty chair across from Jim and fixed him with a calculating look. Jim just stared at him for a moment before sticking his tongue out. Spock narrowed his eyes and sat back in his chair while Jim grinned with a childish glee.

But Jim's not childish.

"Captain, have I done something that displeases you?" Spock asked suddenly, and Jim fumbled with the cup he was lifting to his mouth and set it back down on the table. He traced the condensation on it with his finger as he studiously ignored Spock's gaze.

"Don't be silly Spock." He mumbled before smiling halfheartedly at a point just over Spock's right shoulder.

"I assure you Captain-" Spock began, before Jim interrupted him.

"Spock. How many times have I told you to call me Jim?" Jim asked, heaving a long suffering sigh that was only slightly overkill.

"Fifty-six times, Jim. And I assure you that Vulcans are never silly." Jim stared at him in disbelief.

"Well that's a bunch of crap." Jim retorted, looking back down at his cup.

"I fail to understand how excrement pertains to this conversation." Spock replied, but as Jim peeked up at Spock's face, he saw the glint in his eye.

"Right there! You're being silly!" He cried, finally smiling at Spock like he meant it.

"Jim. You still have not answered my question." Jim's momentary happiness was gone, and the worry gnawed at his stomach. _He can't know. He'll find it _illogical_ and probably never speak to me again._

"Yes I did." Jim lied, and Spock raised an unimpressed eyebrow at him.

"Jim-" Spock started, but was interrupted by Chekov flinging himself at Jim.

"Keptin! I have secret to tell you!" Chekov shouted, steadying himself with a hand on Jim's shoulder. Spock's gaze snapped to that hand and his eyes narrowed infinitesimally. Jim looked at him in confusion and when Spock's eyes snapped up to meet his, Jim became confused at the _anger_—was that anger?—he saw. Before he could think about it further, Chekov drew his attention away by whispering loudly in his ear.

"Wodka was inwented in Russia!" Chekov told Jim, before he slithered to the ground in a heap of giggles and started muttering in Russian. Jim stared at him in bemusement before grinning widely and looking at Spock, momentarily forgetting that he was supposed to be avoiding Spock's gaze and company, because it made him all _tingly._

James Tiberius Kirk doesn't _do_ tingly.

"Oh man. Sorry, Captain. I'll get him to bed." Sulu appeared behind Jim's shoulder and smiled down at Chekov. "He's obviously had too much punch." Sulu leaned down and scooped Chekov up in his arms as if he weighed nothing.

"Hikaru! _Moi__̆__ spasitel__ʹ__…" _ Chekov cried, throwing his arms around Sulu's neck. "You alvays take care of me." Chekov nuzzled his nose into Sulu's neck, oblivious to the flush that was creeping up it.

"Um. Night Captain!" Sulu was hurriedly backing away with Chekov held securely in his arms. "Commander." Spock nodded at Sulu, who nodded back before turning and striding from the rec room.

"What just happened?" Jim asked incredulously, because he wasn't sure he could believe what he had just seen.

"Ensign Chekov just called Lieutenant Sulu his savior." Spock replied, eyebrow raised and just a hint of a smile on his lips.

Jim felt The Urge—and it totally deserves the capitalization in his mind, because this was so not good—shoot through him again at the sight of that small smile. Jim's eyes widened and he grasped his cup tightly to stop himself from doing something utterly fucking _stupid_ like grabbing Spock's face and dragging him across the table and kissing the crap out of him…

Jim abruptly stood, interrupting whatever Spock was saying, because he just couldn't _handle_ this right now.

"I gotta go." He blurted, turning to leave.

"Jim." Spock stood as well, and reached out as if to stop Jim, but then brought his hand back to his side. "Are you well, Jim?" Spock asked softly. Jim nodded, and then spotted Uhura over Spock's shoulder, looking at them curiously. Jim felt his heart drop. Even without the reasoning that Spock wouldn't welcome Jim's attraction toward him, Spock was still with Uhura.

Jim could be a dick sometimes, but not that much of a dick. If Spock was happy with Uhura, he wasn't going to do anything to mess that up.

"Actually, no. I don't feel good at all. I'll see you later, Spock." Jim whispered, quickly turning and darting out of the room.

"Jim!" Spock called, following him into the hall, but Jim just darted into the turbolift.

"Seriously Spock. I might puke." Jim mumbled as Spock strode into the 'lift with him and pressed the button for the deck with their quarters.

"All the more reason for me to assist you." Spock said, staring at Jim with and unreadable expression in his eyes.

"Go back to the party, Spock. You left Uhura." Jim said, looking down at his boots.

"Nyota can manage by herself." Spock replied. "Although, I do not understand why-"

"Spock," Jim interrupted, "I just need some space right now."

"Understood, Captain." Jim flinched at the tone and the spasm of pain that went through his chest at Spock's return to professionalism. _I deserve it._

Spock turned to the doors of the turbolift and didn't look at Jim even when the doors opened on their deck. Jim stepped out and turned to Spock, maybe to apologize, maybe to assure himself Spock wasn't completely mad at him, but the doors closed before Jim could fully turn around.

Defeated, Jim turned and stumbled to his quarters. He really did feel like he was about to throw up.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: **I just want to say thank you so much to everyone who has reviewed, favorited, and alerted my story. It really means a lot to me that people are enjoying reading this story.

Sorry for the long wait between updates. School, and just life in general, has caught up to me this past month. In fact, if it wasn't for **brionyjae**, who reviewed yesterday, this chapter probably wouldn't even be up right now. It reminded me, "Oh hey! I should probably update that!" And then the words just flowed really easily. I hope you all enjoy!

xxx

Waking up the next day was hell. There was obviously something stronger in that punch than vodka. Jim groaned and dragged his hands over his face, unsticking his tongue from the acrid roof of his mouth.

Squinting at the chronometer, Jim realized he was up on time for once. Not that being up right now was anything to be happy about.

Jim slowly pushed himself up and out of bed, and stumbled over to his desk. He fumbled with his communicator for a minute before pressing the right button.

"The hell do you want, Jim?" Bones' southern drawl blasted out of the communicator, and Jim winced, almost dropping it.

"Shhhh Bones. Not so loud." He croaked. His throat felt like he decided to eat flaming hot Vulcan rocks for breakfast.

"Oh hell no Jim. I am not giving you a hangover remedy. I told you the last time this happened…" Jim stopped paying attention to Bones' voice, and started paying to attention to how very fucking _cold_ he was.

"Computer. Raise temperature two degrees." Jim rasped, setting his communicator back on the desk, abruptly ending the call with Bones without realizing it. Jim stepped over to his dresser and pulled on his old Academy sweatshirt, before shuffling back to bed and climbing in.

_Just a few more minutes of sleep…_

xxx

"…many times do I have to tell him to take it easy? Jesus fucking Christ. His temperature is way too high!" Jim whimpered and tried to burrow his head below his blankets even further.

"Jim?" Jim cracked an eye open to stare balefully at Bones.

"Whaddya want?" Jim whispered, wincing when speaking brought his attention back to the burning in his throat. Bones sighed and shook his head.

"Every fucking time. Jim, why didn't you tell anyone you had the flu?" Jim furrowed his brow.

"Do not." Bones glared at him. "Yes you do. And you're not going anywhere until you're all better." Jim's protestations were drowned out by another voice. A voice that made Jim feel all warm and snuggly inside.

So maybe he did have a fever.

"Captain, I agree with Doctor McCoy." Spock said, lifting an eyebrow at Jim as if daring Jim to contradict. Jim glared at him and stuck his tongue out.

"Whatever. You just want my ship." Jim croaked, turning his back on Bones and Spock. He shivered violently and winced when his sore head jerked around.

"Are you quite certain there is nothing you can do for him?" Spock asked quietly behind him, ignoring Jim's pitiful attempts to banter with him.

"He just needs to stay warm for right now." Bones replied. "But he's already got the heat cranked up, and tons of layers on. I don't see what could make him warmer."

After a few seconds of silence, Jim felt warmth engulf the curve of his shoulder. He sighed in pleasure, and a small smile broke out on his lips.

"I believe I have found the solution." Spock's voice was low, and Jim shivered with something that definitely had nothing to do with how cold he was.

"If you're sure Spock." Bones sounded uncertain. "Is this ok with you Jim?"

Jim nodded slightly, and rolled his shoulder back as he tried to get more of that delicious warmth.

"Alright. I already gave you a hypo before you woke up. Spock, in four hours give him this one." Jim heard something click as it made contact with his desk, and he glared at the wall when he realized it was a hypospray.

"I hate you." Jim growled, and glared even harder when he heard Bones laugh.

"Oh, I know. Feel better kid." Jim heard the swish of his doors as Bones left, and then there was silence.

Silence until Spock, who hadn't removed his hand from Jim's shoulder, broke it.

"Jim." Funny. He almost sounded…hesitant.

"Get in the bed, Spock. I'm tired and I want to go back to sleep."

"As you wish." Jim had heard something about that phrase before, and it niggled in the back of his mind until he told it to shut the fuck up please. He was trying to sleep.

Jim sighed in utter contentment as Spock slid into the bed behind him, surrounding him with his spicy smelling warmth. Jim smiled and turned over.

When Jim's eyes met Spock's, he couldn't breathe. Jim couldn't decipher what he was seeing, though he was sure he'd be able to if he was fully coherent. His eyes flicked down to Spock's mouth, and he wondered if Spock would taste as spicy as he smelt.

Oh boy.

Before Jim could think about that any longer, his eyelids started to droop. He tucked his head into Spock's neck and inhaled deeply.

"Thanks, Spock." And with that, Jim promptly fell asleep.

If he hadn't, he might have caught what Spock whispered next.

"Anything for you, Jim."


	5. Chapter 5

Jim came into awareness the next morning wrapped in a cocoon of warmth. He pressed his face into the pillow under his face and inhaled the spicy aroma that it was enveloped in.

Funny. He didn't remember having a pillow that smelled spicy, or was that warm for that matter. Jim slowly opened his eyes, freezing when the sight of pale skin greeted him instead of his normal, white pillowcase.

"What…?" Jim muttered, blink owlishly at Spock's neck, before shifting his gaze down the line of the bodies to where their legs were tangled together under the blankets. Scowling in confusion, Jim finally looked at Spock's face, jerking back when he realized Spock was awake and staring at him.

"Are you well, Jim?" Spock asked quietly, lifting a hand to press against Jim's forehead, his eyebrows drawn down in concentration, causing a little wrinkle to appear between them.

A wrinkle that Jim wanted to press his lips to until it smoothed out.

"_Fuck._" Jim exclaimed, scrambling away from Spock and off of the bed. His knees buckled as soon as he hit the floor, and he found himself sprawled face first on the floor of his cabin.

"Jim!" Spock quickly got out of the bed behind him, and bent to help Jim up. Jim scrambled away before Spock put a hand on him, because he didn't think he could control himself.

"Don't! Just…don't." Jim said, backing himself up against his desk. Spock stared at him with what looked like confusion in his eyes.

"Jim. What is the matter?" Spock asked, taking a step closer to Jim, but stopping when Jim stumbles back against the desk.

"I just can't anymore, okay?" Jim says, trying to steady himself.

"Jim. I do not understand." Jim sighed in frustration and clenched his fists.

"Being around you is torture, Spock!" Jim cried, "You don't know how many times I've wanted to kiss you or, fuck, just be _with_ you, and not just during shift. I want to come back here at the end of the day and be able to know you'll be here, and I fucking can't!"

Spock looked shocked. Or, as shocked as it was possible for a Vulcan to look.

"Exactly what is stopping you?" Spock asked, and Jim froze.

"What? You…what the - _Uhura!_" Jim croaked, the frustration and confusion make tears well up in his eyes. "_Fuck._" Jim scrubbed his eyes ferociously with the back of his hand, turning away from Spock and leaning heavily on his desk.

"I think you should go." Jim said quietly, wishing Spock would just leave and never, ever say a word about this again.

"Jim, I do not believe you understand."

"I understand perfectly, and I really can't do this." Jim whispered.

"No, Jim-" Spock started before he was interrupted by an incoming message on Jim's terminal.

Jim accepted the message, and turned his attention to the face of Bones on the screen.

"What's up, Bones?" Jim asked, still silently willing Spock to leave his quarters.

"How're you feeling?" Bones asked, scrutinizing Jim carefully, and Jim could see the suspicion in his eyes.

"Oh, I'm just great." Jim said, ignoring the look Bones shot him. "Anything else?"

"Yeah. Get your scrawny ass down here so I can make sure you're really okay. If you dawdle, there might be more vaccinations in your future." Bones said, before ending the transmission.

Jim turned around avoided looking at Spock.

"You heard him, Spock. I can't ignore orders from my CMO." Jim said, inching towards the door.

"You have never listened to him." Spock said, almost glaring at Jim, "I request you stay for a moment so I can-"

Jim was glad that he was closer to the door than Spock.

He hoped he didn't look as ridiculous as he felt when he ran out of the room as fast as he could.

He wasn't childish, remember?


	6. Chapter 6

**Thank you so much to everyone who has read, reviewed, alerted, and favorited this story! It all means so much to me! :) I hope you enjoy the last chapter and that my affinity for the f-bomb doesn't offend anyone. :D**

**xxx**

"All set, Jim." Bones said, turning off his tricorder and patting Jim on the shoulder. "You have today off, and just come back if you start to feel sick again."

"Yeah, okay." Jim mumbled, thinking that that was never going to happen. The only reason he came willingly this time was because he was relieved he had a chance to get away from Spock.

"Is there something you want to talk to me about, Jim?" Bones asked, "You're quiet, and it's freaking my nurses out. Chapel has been hovering for the past ten minutes because she thinks you're going to have a psychotic break."

Jim glared over his shoulder at Chapel, who raised her eyebrows and shrugged.

"I'm just being stupid. As usual." Jim replied, not meeting Bones' eyes.

"Did something happen between you and Spock?" Bones asked.

"What? Why would you ask that?" Jim exclaimed, guilt and frustration churning in his stomach.

"Because you're only a sullen, mopey mess when you've had a fight with your favorite Vulcan."

Jim opened his mouth to protest, but then realized that it was the truth.

"I just wanted something he couldn't give." Jim mumbled quietly, not meeting Bones' eyes.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Bones asked incredulously, "That green-blooded hobgoblin would move mountains for you!"

"He has someone else, Bones!" Jim cried, "And I can't fucking take it anymore, and I just made myself look like a fucking idiot-"

"Not a hard thing to do-"

"-and probably ruined our friendship!" Jim finished, looking around the room uncomfortably, and once again glaring at Chapel over his shoulder. What he didn't expect was for Chapel to laugh.

"If you're talking about Nyota, they broke up about a month after the Narada incident." She said, looking smug.

"What?"

"Think I'd know." Chapel replied, looking pretty pleased with herself. Why the fu-

"Ohhh…" Jim breathed, his thought process slowing down as he thought about that, because hey, he was only human, what could you do…and then his brain rocketed back to its normal pace.

"Fuck, really?" Jim cried, "That's fantastic for you! And that means…"

Jim shot up from his seat on the biobed.

"Fuck! I have to find Spock now!"

"You're a fucking idiot, Kirk." Jim spun towards Chapel, striding toward her and grasping her by her shoulders.

"And you are beautiful!" He cried, planting a kiss on her cheek before turning and sprinting out of Sickbay, sliding on his socked feet and hitting the wall before heading in the direction of the bridge.

"What a goddamn moron." Bones muttered, shaking his head and striding into his office.

Chapel's bright, clear laughter rang throughout Sickbay.

xxx

Two minutes later, and that has to be a fucking record or something, Jim is sliding onto the bridge in the middle of Alpha shift.

"Spock!" Jim shouted, sliding to a halt in front of the captains chair, and only didn't fall because Spock had risen out of the seat and steadied Jim by grasping his elbows. A thrill went through Jim when Spock didn't let go.

"Jim. You are not scheduled for this shift. You should be resting. Is something wrong?" And Spock is still asking Jim questions like he cares about Jim even though Jim was such a fucking _asshole_ to him and how could he ever forgive him?

" I just… I thought you and Uhura, and then Chapel said, and fuck-" Jim did what he'd wanted to for months, and kissed Spock.

On the bridge of the _Enterprise._

In front of his whole bridge crew.

In his rainbow socks, ratty sweatpants, and "Some Genius Billionaire Playboy Philanthropists Marry Their Super Soldiers. Get Over It." shirt.

Well, fuck. He hadn't really thought of that before he left (fucking bolted like a pansy) his quarters this morning. No wonder Chapel though he was going insane.

But none of that mattered now, because he was _kissing Spock. _

_Finally._

"Well finally." Sulu muttered, earning a chuckle from Chekov.

Jim and Spock broke apart and Jim grinned at Spock, unclenched his fingers from where they were twisted in Spock's shirt, and smoothed down the blue material. The corners of Spock's mouth turned up in response.

"Um, I'll see you after shift, Mr. Spock." Jim said, as he backed away toward the turbo lift.

"Indeed." Spock replied, one eyebrow rising as the corners of his mouth twitched some more. Turning to the rest of the bridge crew, he said, "I believe you all have work to be doing."

Jim watched as Spock settled back in the captain's chair, and shot a wink at Uhura before stepping into the turbo lift.

And ducking the stylus Uhura lobbed at his head.

"Lieutenant, do not indulge-"

Jim stuck his tongue out at Uhura as the door to the lift slid shut on Spock reprimanding her, and collapsed into laughter that was part glee, and part relief.

Not childish at all.

Fin.


End file.
